Keys to a Great Buddies Golf Trip

If you’re reading this paragraph on the day it was published, you should know that — right now — I’m somewhere on a golf course at Sand Valley, probably trying to break 90 in 50-degree weather.

I am not very good at golf, so I will not bore you with any details of my trip. Unless you have just played Augusta National, there is nothing on earth quite as mind-numbing as listening to an amateur recount their round, shot by shot, hoping that you will be riveted by what they experienced. But I will encourage you, if you don’t already have one, to start a buddies trip. Don’t wait until next year. Don’t think for a second that you’re not good enough. If you love golf, find at least three additional friends (preferably seven) and go find a place to play. You do not have to go to Bandon Dunes, Sand Valley, or Scotland. The venue is irrelevant.

Just find a place and commit. Don’t wait. The days are long, but the years are short.

This will be my 17th year going on a trip with the same group of friends. Prior to getting invited on this trip in 2009, I did not play much golf. I had never played a lick of match play in my life. I thought golf was something you did on a weekend or your day off. If I broke 100, I was elated. A lot of people approach golf this way. Traveling to Wisconsin or Oregon or Scotland to play golf is about as realistic as going to the moon.

I don’t think it needs to be that way. People like me — not exactly an influencer, but a person of influence at a prominent golf media company — ought to do a better job of normalizing budget golf trips. For the first five years, my buddies and I never left the state of Maryland. We never came close to spending $1,000 for three days of golf, lodging, food, and alcohol. We spend more money these days, and often pick bucket-list destinations and plan years in advance, but the only reason we’re still together is simple. We nailed the stuff that really matters, the competition and the camaraderie.

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Every buddies trip has to find its own personality. These suggestions may not suit your friend group, so adjust or disregard accordingly. They might even sound like LinkedIn engagement bait, so apologies in advance for that.

But if you occasionally daydream of getting a trip going, here would be my advice on how to turn it into 20 years of meaningless-but-indespensible fun. Stick to the Four Cs.

1. Competition. Divide your group into two teams and play in a format similar to a Ryder Cup. You can do this with four people, but it’s a lot better with eight. You don’t need to wear similar uniforms (that’s too corny, even for me), but you should buy a trophy. Handicap everything, and pick someone who thrives on details to dot up all the cards. We have an individual stroke play trophy, but that’s become secondary to winning the cup in everyone’s minds. One year, we bought four turquoise suit jackets and had a jacket ceremony for the winning team when it was over. The picture was the screen saver on my phone for the entire year, until I had to slip the jacket on my friend the following year.

2. Coordination. Appoint someone to be your planning czar. Someone who will call the courses, arrange the tee times, book the Airbnb, research flights or rental cars. This is a thankless role, but someone in your group will thrive in it. Trust them and lean into their organizational skills.

3. Camaraderie: Switch up your pairings every round. I had never met two of the guys on my team before I teed it up with them 17 years ago. Now they are two of my best friends. The same goes for the other guys on the trip. They have stood by my side through job changes, the birth of my kids, a divorce, and a second marriage. They are essentially family at this point. Any golf trip that doesn’t switch things up and force you to play with someone different every round is doing it wrong.

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4. Compilations. Keep records. Save them in an Excel spreadsheet. This might sound silly, but it becomes more fun with each passing year. There are few things more entertaining, leading up to the next trip, than recounting the best (and worst) rounds in tournament history. I can tell you exactly what my career low is on the golf trip, and I also know how many entries I have in our Hall of Shame. I know how many individual titles everyone has won, and I know the career low for all my friends on the trip. It’s the most essential and meaningless information I carry around in my brain.

There are other suggestions I’d make, like making sure everyone is comfortable with the level of drinking and that you find the happy medium between bachelor party and teetotalism convention. I love playing a scramble or alternate shot as part of our trip, but some groups can’t stand the idea of not posting a score on every course you play. Mostly — and this will sound cliché — but be where your feet are. I have been on golf trips where I hit it terribly and I sulked my way through a dream vacation with my friends. It’s a huge regret. It doesn’t matter how good you are at golf; unless you are a professional golfer reading this, it’s not your job. You will not be judged or applauded for how many pars you make. Appreciate your time with friends. Give thanks. Swing boldly and look forward to next time the minute it ends.